No Thank you-

 

 

 

A really close friend of mine met an African American man at his work the other day. He was a retired vet and was telling him that since Obama has been in office racism has gone back 20 years. People do not realize that the president of the United States of America is not some pop culture FAD or trend, we need to look at what is best for our country as a whole. Not saying that I am Republican or Democratic, because I am neither, I vote on the best candidate that I see... Please look at the facts for BOTH Obama and Romney- Don't vote based on emotion or race.

Sorry it's been so long-- I got HITCHED!

Hello!!

Since I blogged last- I have bought a house ( fixed up the house-- it was a MESS ), got married, been on my honeymoon and have been livin' it up with my best friend. I thought I would share some pictures of our big day- and I will be posting more now that my life has slowed down a bit!!


 A HUGE thank you to Katie Wilson @ Julep Studios for her AMAZING Photography!!!!

3 miracles--

Hellooo!!

So God is so good- Sunday at youth group we witnessed 3 miracles!!

It all started out as a normal youth group- but when I look outside, there is a police officer in our church ( he turned out to be Pete, our youth pastor's brother in law). Then I look further down the corridor and see a bunch of Mennonite high school guys and girls. Ryan Evan ( a youth staff ) then pulled me aside and told me that these kids are from North Carolina and were in Charlottesville for a youth retreat. They were on their way home in a 15 passenger van and their driver ( who was the dad of 3 of the 12 kids inside ) had a heart attack and hit the guardrail on the 288 bridge, and flew off the bridge. The van behind following them behind (also with the group ) said he saw the van fly off the bridge and had no idea what to expect when he looked over to see if he could see them.

Hans ( Pete's brother in law ) was the first one to the scene. Hans is a believer and he went in to action. Miracle #1- NONE OF THE KIDS WERE HURT. They hit a guardrail, flew off a bridge and did not get even a scratch!!! Hans said that any further right they would have ended up in the James River- any further left and they would have ended up in a swamp. But they landed on soft ground between the swamp and the river.

Well- unfortunately the dad was pronounced dead at the scene and the mom (who was in the passenger seat) was in serious condition and sent to MCV. So, Hans, knowing that they were only minutes from Hope- got the Hope shuttle bus and got all of the kids to Hope. Meanwhile- we are having a full blown youth group. There were about 50-75 kids in that building last night- Andrew was Manning one door to ensure that no one got out of the room and someone else was at the other door doing the same, to ensure privacy for the kids. After a few minutes I asked them if they were hungry and told them that Andrew and I would go get them food, but then in true God fashion Ryan and Jennifer Mitchell ( another youth staff person ) remembered that we had bought 6 pizzas and tons of soda for the winning group of a scavenger hunt we had the previous weekend. So we supplied them with Pizza and drinks ( along with chips, pretzels, cookies and chocolate bars we had found). And I took them to the prayer room so they could totally be separated from everyone else and have time to go through what happened together.

During all of the chaos Nicole and Wes Mullins ( Other youth Staff ) took the 3 children of the driver and mom to the hospital to see their parents.

While they were in the prayer room- since Nicole had left, Cody took over youth group. Instead of a lesson he broke everyone up into small groups and we prayed. We prayed for the family, for the dad and mom for the children, and we were all praying hard and with our whole hearts- Miracle #2- During the praying, Hans told Cody that some how the dad was going in and out of consciousness!!!! Once pronounced DEAD at the scene, and an hour later he is coming in and out of consciousness???? Really? WOW - God is SO good. So Cody then tells everyone to pray again- Pray hard, pray in anyway you need to, stand up, sit down, raise your hands, dance do whatever you feel like you need to do, but lets really pray for a miracle that he will stay alive. After about 5 minutes of prayer Miracle #3 comes in to play-- HANS ANNOUNCES THAT THE DAD IS ALIVE. REALLY GOD??? You are SO SO SO GOOD!!!!!

Prayer works!! He was DEAD - now he is ALIVE. Prayer really really really works!!!

Also- Hans decided to talk to the youth group to inform them of what was going on- during this time the tow truck came to Hope with the wrecked 15 passenger van. Jennifer Mitchell and I went out fast with boxes to get all of their belongings out of the van so that the kids didn't have to see the damage done. Things were wet and just thrown everywhere. But I noticed something really cool- the only REAL damage to the car was to the passenger side. But it looked like he had hit a pole ( in reality it was the guardrail ) but there was no real sign that it FLEW OFF A BRIDGE!! It's like God took the van in mid air and gently placed it down on the ground!!! I mean COME ON that is AWESOME!!!

So, all of the youth kids left to go home- and a few drivers from NC came up to pick up the remaining kids. We baked cookies and made coffee for them all. And Hans told us some more interesting facts about this day.

#1- He was not supposed to work last night-

#2- He said that it was crazy how none of the kids were hurt

#3- He told us that during the heart attack the dad somehow turned the wheel left and that is what saved them.

God is SO SO good.

One more thing about this event- Wes Mullins mom has a carriage house, that she is letting the family stay in- all 13 of them ( I guess some of them were either in a different van or drove up from NC).

I am CERTAIN God let us be a part of a few miracles last night. I feel so honored.

I wanted to share this with you to show you that God does still work in miracles in today's time- we just have to recognize them as miracles and praise God for HIS work....Prayer works.

As of right now- the dad is still alive, but struggling alot and in critical condition- so it is CRITICAL that we keep praying for him and this amazing famiy!! The mom is supposed to have gotten surgery I THINK either today or tomorrow, so also pray for her recovery!!

CandyLand Board DONE

Jingle Jam update #3

Getting so close!!!!

Jingle Jam update...

THOUGHTS?

Jingle Jam...

So, for our churches Jingle Jam event this Saturday I am making a life size Candy Land board for the kids to walk on. So far I am progessing slowing over the past 2 days, but here is what I have so far.

ALOT of work still to do, but I'll update on the progess......

BIG NEWS

I AM GETTING MARRIED!!!!!

Not only that, but it's to the man I have always dreamed of marrying since I was about 12. That's right, it's one of THOSE stories!! But it is MY WONDERFUL story.

Andrew proposed to me around 7PM on Friday, September 9, 2011. It was at the beach, during sunset. It was PERFECT. Here is a little run down on how it all happened....

     We had the PERFECT day. We both took off work and headed to the beach. It was a BEAUTIFUL/SUNNY day and the waves were HUGE!! Andrew headed out to surf ( and got barreled by a couple waves!) and I snapped some photos and read a bunch. We headed in for a late lunch/early dinner and cooked up some fish we had picked up from our favorite local fish market. Then Andrew asked if I wanted to go for a walk on the beach before we headed home, and so off we went.

    During our stroll down the beach Andrew was snapping photos of really random stuff, but I really didnt think anything of it, we kept on walkin'. The tide was high and the sand was really hard to walk on, and we were both feelin' some pain in our feet so I told him we should turn around, but Andrew was determined!! We headed straight for our usual spot where we like to set up the camera on timer and take a few pictures of ourselves acting silly.

     We took one of ourselves standing infront of the ocean, and then Andrew went to check it out and "readjust" the lense. Well, it felt like he was up there for forever, while I was standing there solo twirling around or asking Andrew what was taking so long. After about a grand total of about 45 seconds of Andrew fiddling around with the lense bag, he clicked the button and came running down to me. I went to put my arm around him to take the picture, and the next thing I knew he was down on one knee with a ring box wide open, with the most beautiful ring I have ever seen!! And it was then and there that he asked me to marry him. After total shock and mis-belief that I was not dreaming, I said YES!!!  So WE ARE GETTING MARRIED!!! I will soon be Jessica VanFossen Parham!!! I CAN'T WAIT!!!


Here is what the night looked like....

This was our amazing view....

This is me in utter shock!! And Andrew asking me the question I have always wanted to hear from him!!

 This is me and my future husband... I am the most BLESSED woman in the world!!!!!!



And these are of my Ring!!!

Be real with God.

Every morning I sit down with my cup of coffee and I read. Lately my readings have taken me to Psalms. I have fallen inlove with them. Maybe it is my place in life that is allowing me to relate on a very minut scale to David or maybe God is softening my heart and giving me more understanding. But whatever it is I am lovin' it.

This mornings Psalm is Psalm 13. I have such great respect for this particular Psalm because it is raw and honest. Verses 1-4 are honest cries and pleas to the Lord.

¹ How long, LORD? Will you forget me forever?
   How long will you hide your face from me? 

² How long must I wrestle with my thoughts
   and day after day have sorrow in my heart?
   How long will my enemy triumph over me?


 ³ Look on me and answer, LORD my God.
   Give light to my eyes, or I will sleep in death, 

⁴ and my enemy will say, “I have overcome him,” 
   and my foes will rejoice when I fall. 


Look at those lines!!! How many times do we FEEL those emotions. How many days do we wrestle with ourselves and feel totally demolished by life and those around us? If you are anything like me, it is sometimes on a daily basis ( depending on the depth of the situations ). BUT how often do we HONESTLY cry out to God in the way? David throws out the fancy "holy words" and is REAL with God. He is telling him that he feels like God has forgotten him. Left him to wrestle with himself and his thorughts. He is pleading with God to LOOK ON HIM AND ANSWER HIM!! He feels defeated.


But then look at verses 5-6 :


⁵ But I trust in your unfailing love;
   my heart rejoices in your salvation. ⁶ I will sing the LORD’s praise,
   for he has been good to me.


David knows no matter what GOD IS GOOD. God is the one that you put ALL your trust in. God is good even in the bad. I think this is where my lesson from David comes in. I usually have no issue telling God exacly how I feel ( even though he knows it-even If I am lying to myself ). But I need to always rememeber that EVEN IN THE BAD TIMES, God is good. He may allow bad things to happen, but he is still good.

"Why fit in when you were born to stand out?" - Dr.Seuss

In middle school, highschool and the beginning years of college, I was very aware of what others thought of me. I was aware of the clothes I was wearing, what I was saying, how things were said to me, and I was hyper sensitive to the way others "viewed" me. Sadly, It took me around 22 years to figure out that Dr. Seuss was right. WHY SHOULD I FIT IN WITH THE REST OF THE WORLD, WHEN GOD CREATED ME TO STAND OUT??

I have seen this lesson played out over and over again in my life. Once I learned that I don't have to  compromise who I am people learned to appreciate and respect me more for EXACTLY who I am. I am silly, I am antsy, I am random, I am compassionate, I don't talk about others behind their back or gossip. I am 100% me. And I have learned that people may be thrown off by that at first, but then they grow to LOVE it.

I wish I had learned this lesson earlier on in life, it really would have saved me alot of insecurity and heart ache. I now realize that God did not make me to Fit iN. He made me to be uniquly me. My life does not revolve around a guy, the latest trends, the "popular" crowd or whether or not someone likes me or not anymore. I have learend that none of those things really matter.

In life guys come and go ( all but ONE, and he will love you for exactly who you are anyways, flaws and all). In life trends definitley come and go and the popular girl is popular one day and then the next she is a total loser. So WHY NOT be 100% you? Stand up for who you are. People will love you for who you are and if they don't then its ok, they don't have too. But don't make someone like you for who you AREN'T because then you will go around living a lie.

SO CHEERS TO YOU! Because you are amazing!!

Help a teacher out...

So that time of year is rolling around again. It is time to buy those fresh packs of paper, pencils, markers, crayons, a new backpack, ect. But why don't you take a look from a teachers perspective.

My best friend Courtney is a teacher in a low income area in NC, and she does not get provided with the tools and supplies needed for her classroom to function smoothly. Her kids cannot afford supplies to last through out the year, and as big as Courtneys heart is, her wallet during the school year because of school supplies, is not. Please take a second to read her blog and think about helping a fellow teacher friend ( or Courtney herself, I can get the supplies to her! )

http://courtneyincarolina.blogspot.com/2011/07/back-to-school-supplies-part-2-or-how-i.html

17 years of Sass and Class...

Olivia Edwards is 17 years of sass and class. She is the most honest and genuine person I know. She tells you how it is and is not afraid to be HERSELF. Olivia spent a week with me when I was babysitting over night for our awesome friend/mentor Nicole Unice . We laughed everynight so hard that we would cry. She introduced me to Jersey Shore ( I still don't understand that show Olivia ) and "I Used to be Fat". She would comentate the whole time and I LOVED it.  She shared a room with Stacie, Kristy and I at Passion and we were all introduced to a new level of vulerability with eachother and it was a beautiful thing. And we all learned on that trip what it was to be "scene" thanks to Olivia.

My good, wonderful friend Olivia, got in a serious car accient on Tuesday, where she was Medivac'ed to MCV where the doctors discovered bleeding in her brian and splean. She has been in critical but stable condition since Tuesday. And as Saturday rolls around we are seeing little glimps of hope.

Olivia has been moving her hands around a little bit, and when her dad asked her "How many kisses do you want Olivia" she responded with "one". It doesn't seem like much but PRAISE THE LORD for that progress. Dr.'s say it will be a really long road. 1-2 months in the hospital, with months of physical therapy and recovery.

I tell you all this to ask you for your prayer. Anytime you think about her pray. Isaiah 55:8 says "For your thoughts are not my thoughts, nor your ways my ways, declares the Lord". This is a verse I constantly have to remember. God has a plan in this for Olivia, and for everyone involved in Olivias life. She is a beautiful example of God's child.

insecurity and prayer

Prayer is not my strong suit.  I hate to admit that, but its just not one the things that comes with ease to me. And you know what? I get insecure about it. I help out at youth group along with quite a few other 20 somethings, and during a group prayer I find myself comparing my prayer to other peoples. If I go first I am down because it feels like everyone else's prayer seems to "trump" mine. If I want to pray at any given point in the group prayer, I sometimes stop myself because I know my prayer will come out as less " godly" or "moving". And half of the time I am analyzing everyone and the passion in their voice or their choice of wording, I'm not fully there and I'm not honoring the fact that we are talking to GOD. What is up with that?

Why in the world would I compare my prayer to someone elses? We are all talking to the same God! Why do I allow myself to feel insecure, compare and feel like people will think that I fail at my prayer life. Just because I sometimes start off my prayers like:

 " Hey God, what's up? My day really sucked today! I just want you to know that I am really struggling with everything in life right now"

                                                     Verses

" Dear Heavely Father, thank you so much for your gracious mercies that appear new to me each and everymorning, thank you for the sufferings you supply me with that I may grow."

DOES NOT mean that I fail at my prayer life. It means I am being ME. It means I am being honest with God and I am not sugar coating anything with him, I mean he knows me inside and out already, why try and hide it?  I mean still pray with respect, but there is NO prayer vocabulary. There is no prayer model to follow, it comes from the heart. So why do I get insecure?? Who cares if other people's prayers get really affirming comments and reactions, as long as I am being REAL with God, I think that is enough. Now if I can just keep reminding myself of this.

Have faith like a child right?

New stages

    It has been awhile since I updated, so here I go...

I GRADUATED FROM COLLEGE!! ( Pictures to prove it!! )

<<<<< REAL Proof hahah

I took a week an a half off from everything to just chill and BE for a bit before I started "real life" at CarMax!! I think that was the best thing I could have done. I wish I would have taken MORE time to just be but, the 1.5 weeks was GREAT!! Andrew and I went to the beach 2 times and then went 4-wheeling, it was SO much fun!!

Well, Like I said above I now work at CarMax Coorprate Office! BIIIIG BIIIIIG Change for  me, and if I'm honest with you, one I don't love. Sitting at a "9-5" job in a cubical, calling people all day long, is NOT AT ALL my idea of fun. It is not me at all. I need a CREATIVE job. Something where I can express myself and talk to people and see color and LIFE!! I need creativity outside of the Doodling I do when I am on hold.
[ Below are pictures of my desk and my "hold doodles"]

Although, having a "real job" is not too bad. When you leave, you leave your work at work. I don't have homework or anything to study for, I just go to work, come home and VAWALA I can BE where I am.

If I am honest with you again, my attitude this week towards my job has been very poor. I think I am at the breaking point, where I SHOULD know what to do in 95% of the situations, but I'm more at the 75% mark and it makes me feel insecure and stupid. I have this HUGE fear of failure, that I won't be good enough, that I will let myself down and I will look bad infront of others! It has been eating me alive. And even though I have Philippians 4:11 ["Not that I am speaking of being in need, for I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content."] taped to my computer,
I find myself to be disatisfied. I am working on it, but like my job I feel like contentment has put me on hold. But I'll wait. I'm not saying it will be an easy "hold" but I need to once again re-adjust and find out who I am in my new world.

Can I help you???

       I have been paying attention to peoples words and actions alot more lately. Something that I have noticed that has started to rub me the wrong way, is when someone tells you that if you need anything to call them, BUT you know they are doing somethiing that they cannot leave or won't leave to lend you the help offered. That really bothers me. I know that the person may WANT to help you, but what if you actually needed help, and you were to go to that person, and then they couldn't/wouldn't help you? It's as if the person just WANTS to give off the air of love and compassion without actually following through.
       I am sure I have/do this as well, and that urks me! I want to be the type of person that follows through on their word. It reminds me of Matthew 5:37 "Simply let your 'Yes' be 'Yes,' and your 'No,' 'No'; anything beyond this comes from the evil one." Let your offer be an offer that can be depended on! 

DRUM ROLL PLEASE.........

         Are you ready for the big news?? Sit down, brace yourself.....


I AM FINALLY GRADUATING FROM VCU!!!!!

Thats right.... FINALLY... 5 years in and I will graduate May 21!! GOODNESS. It feels so good. When I got my final grade back I was jumping, screaming and dancing...Ahhh so glorious!! Andrew was with me when I found out and we popped a celebratory bottle of champagne  ( ofcourse shook it up real well to get the "POP", because thats the part that makes it seem legit )!!

So this means I will no longer be "stuck inbetween" college life and "real world" life because I have a job with Carmax now!! I am so pumped, I cannot wait to start this new stage of life. A 9-5 in an office will be hard for me at first, but I'll get used to it. The hardest part will be not being with the Unice's as much!! I will miss hanging with them and being in their lives on such a regular basis, but I will not be GONE GONE. They can't get rid of me.

But that is the news of the week. FINALLY NO MORE VCU!!!

Just another day at the office....

      Nicole Unice and her family are amazing... here are some pictures to prove it! I love watching your kids!! :) Melissa if you read this, I'm lovin yours too!!

Pictures say a thousand words... but the fun we have is too much for words!!